Mr. Gulley sits by the phone in an empty house.<\/p>\n
Somewhere in the halls upstairs from him his cat Inedible clanks by.<\/p>\n
He used to have servants.<\/p>\n
He\u2019s fired them.<\/p>\n
He used to have a wolf. He still does have a wolf, really, but he doesn\u2019t go near it. It\u2019s too dangerous now. He just pours kibble and occasionally cuts of meat into the kibble chute.<\/p>\n
He used to have a son.<\/p>\n
He still does have a son, really, but \u2014<\/p>\n
For the past three weeks, Edmund has missed his weekly call. The nithrid, too. He barely even dares to hope that this time the phone will \u2014<\/p>\n
Only, it does.<\/p>\n
It rings.<\/p>\n
He seizes it up. His heart races. He says, \u201cEdmund?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDad.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cEdmund,\u201d says Mr. Gulley. His face twitches. \u201cI hadn\u2019t thought you\u2019d call.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDad.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019d figured you\u2019d snapped, son,\u201d says Mr. Gulley. \u201cWhat with the reports. Killing people. Eating people. That\u2019s not really \u2014 the point of this, you know.\u201d<\/p>\n
Edmund is silent.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat happened, Ed?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI figured it out, Dad,\u201d says Edmund. \u201cI know how to free the wolf. Can you tell it for me? I know how to let it go. I just have to eat enough people.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe don\u2019t eat people,\u201d says Mr. Gulley.<\/p>\n
\u201cI got hungry,\u201d says Edmund.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe all get hungry!\u201d says Mr. Gulley. \u201cWe all get hungry. We\u2019re Gulleys. But we don\u2019t eat <\/i>people. Not since your great-grandfather, and there was a war on. A war on!\u201d<\/p>\n
Edmund sighs.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ve become an instrument,\u201d says Edmund. \u201cRefined. Perfected. A scalpel. And you can\u2019t be a scalpel without breaking a few eggs.\u201d<\/p>\n
This is not a very good analogy.<\/p>\n
\u201cI mean,\u201d he says, \u201cYou can\u2019t be perfect if you don\u2019t eat people. Sometimes.\u201d<\/p>\n
This is not a very good analogy.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m sharp like my stomach,\u201d Edmund flounders, like an awl.<\/p>\n
\u201cSon,\u201d says Mr. Gulley, \u201cI\u2019m a little worried about you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI only really ate the nithrid,\u201d says Edmund.<\/p>\n
\u201cReally?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019d heard more?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019d heard a lot.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s exaggerated,\u201d Edmund says. \u201cUnless I\u2019ve been sleep-snacking or something. Or, oh, maybe the Principal\u2019s all \u2018oh, hey, another white-hatted person ate somebody again, I bet it\u2019s all Edmund\u2019s<\/i> fault.\u2019 The man is biased, sir.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI see,\u201d says Mr. Gulley, because he does.<\/p>\n
\u201cI do plan <\/i>to eat people,\u201d says Edmund. \u201cIt\u2019s just \u2014 I\u2019m having trouble.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s your upbringing,\u201d says Mr. Gulley. \u201cStern as a Gulley! Hardly ever go into a cannibalistic frenzy, Gulleys. Pillars of the community and all that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPeople keep standing in creepy circles around me,\u201d Edmund says.<\/p>\n
\u201cOh.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s really distracting!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019d tell you to buck up and ignore them,\u201d says Mr. Gulley. \u201cOnly, I won\u2019t. Bullying is a serious problem and I\u2019m afraid there\u2019s nothing for you to do but take it like a man and be so totally distracted that you never eat people. That\u2019s a right proper education, that.\u201d<\/p>\n
Edmund is laughing. He is holding the phone with both hands and he is hunched over so it is close to the hollow where was his heart and he is laughing.<\/p>\n
\u201cI want to eat Sid,\u201d says Edmund.<\/p>\n
\u201cSid?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe\u2019s . . . just, he needs<\/i> me, Dad.\u201d<\/p>\n
There\u2019s just silence on the other end.<\/p>\n
\u201cDad?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201c\u2018He?\u2019\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s not a . . . he\u2019s got his clear hat,\u201d says Edmund. \u201cLike, mucous.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCan\u2019t you \u2014 I mean \u2014\u201d<\/p>\n
Mr. Gulley does not quite know how to express to his son that he\u2019d be more comfortable if his son were planning to hunt down and eat a girl. After a moment he just harrumphs. \u201cI hear you\u2019re <\/i>wearing a white hat,\u201d he says. \u201cYourself. Some sort of Smurf, now, are you?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s not voluntary, Dad.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s not in the dress code, is what it isn\u2019t. The Principal\u2019s complained!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cReally?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, after I told him that he won\u2019t be bringing any charges against any Gulleys for murder and anthropophagy,\u201d says Mr. Gulley. \u201cOn account of my owning his school, his residence, and, if absolutely necessary, his goolies.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe moved on to the hats.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSaid they\u2019re a gang thing,\u201d says Mr. Gulley. \u201cYou should ditch \u2019em.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell,\u201d says Edmund, amusement wound through his voice like a wolf, \u201cthat\u2019s not happening, since I\u2019ve kind of glued mine on. You don\u2019t want me to have to cut off all my hair, do you, Dad?\u201d<\/p>\n
Mr. Gulley stares at the phone for a while.<\/p>\n
After a while, he says, \u201cSometimes it\u2019s hard to remember that they\u2019re people, son. When you get really hungry. But they are. You know?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThey don\u2019t look like it any more, Dad.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI know,\u201d says Mr. Gulley. \u201cBut they are. They\u2019ve got \u2014 thoughts, and feelings, and stuff. I understand, son, but \u2014 they do. They\u2019re like us.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThey\u2019re not like us,\u201d says Edmund.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThey\u2019ve never seen the wolf.\u201d<\/p>\n
And he\u2019s not talking about the bigness of the wolf, or the wisdom in Fenris\u2019 eyes; or the way that Fenris is going to eat both of them, if events proceed as planned. He\u2019s talking about the only thing he can think about, which is the bonds around Fenris\u2019 mouth and legs.<\/p>\n
And in that moment, suddenly, Mr. Gulley is fiercely proud.<\/p>\n
He\u2019s thinking of the telly, which has been all over <\/i>the living storm that\u2019s been beating this way and that over England; and that\u2019s his son, <\/i>there, <\/i>that freed it, that took the nithrid he<\/i> could only drag up to Earth and had let it go. For a moment, he\u2019ll forgive everything else, as worrying as the weather service makes that, because \u2014<\/p>\n
\u201cSon \u2014\u201d starts Mr. Gulley.<\/p>\n
But he doesn\u2019t get to say it. Whatever it was that was going to come out of that pride of him, the words are lost; he doesn\u2019t get to say them, and we\u2019ll never get to hear.<\/p>\n
\u201cI think I\u2019m going to slip, Dad,\u201d Edmund is saying. \u201cI think I\u2019m going to slip. The others in my House, they\u2019re not used to it, they\u2019ve eaten more people, but I don\u2019t think I\u2019m that much better. I think I\u2019m just barely ahead of the curve. I can\u2019t control them. I don\u2019t think I\u2019m even going to be able to control myself. I\u2019ll eat one more. Then two. Then four \u2014 pretty soon, I\u2019ll eat the whole world, and then it\u2019s on to space.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t do it,\u201d says Mr. Gulley. \u201cI raised you better than that, son. Don\u2019t.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDad,\u201d says Edmund. \u201cYou\u2019ve got nothing to do with it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201c. . . what?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI got a magic hat,\u201d says Edmund. \u201cI put it on and it explained everything to me. It told me, I could be the one to free everything. All the tangled masses in their horrors. I could let everything free. I could let them go. Maybe I could hit the prisons, Dad. I could hit the prisons, I could eat the walls. They\u2019d run free, they\u2019d be so happy, Dad. You know that prisons corrupt the prisoners and the guards and even the fabric of the country that has them. That\u2019s why there aren\u2019t any prisoners in Heaven.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t do that, son. Don\u2019t get caught doing that. Don\u2019t \u2014\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHats don\u2019t lie about moral issues, Dad,\u201d Edmund says.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t eat<\/i> people, son.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThey\u2019re not people,\u201d says Edmund. \u201cThey\u2019re just . . .\u201d<\/p>\n
He doesn\u2019t finish.<\/p>\n
After a while, Mr. Gulley says, \u201cI wish I\u2019d had more time with you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDad.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThe wolf\u2019s going to eat me soon,\u201d says Mr. Gulley. \u201cI think. I don\u2019t know how. I just . . . I\u2019ve been . . . I\u2019ve been away so long. If I go down and see him I know he\u2019ll eat me. One snap. He won\u2019t trust me to come back again. But how can I not go see him?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWait, Dad,\u201d says Edmund. \u201cWait. Hang on. Don\u2019t let him. I want \u2014\u201d<\/p>\n
Edmund makes a horrified strangled noise. He hangs up the phone. He hangs up the phone before he can tell his father how much he wants to eat him himself<\/i>. How much he longs for that, to butcher his father and eat him up. How happy that would make him. How delicious it would be.<\/p>\n
\u201cI love you,\u201d says Edmund, to a deadened line.<\/p>\n
After a while Mr. Gulley fumbles the phone back onto the hook.<\/p>\n
He goes to check on Edmund\u2019s heart.<\/p>\n
There\u2019s a small altar in Edmund\u2019s room. On it is a wooden box. In the wooden box is Edmund\u2019s heart.<\/p>\n
Mr. Gulley pats the box. It is sound. It is solid. He listens to Edmund\u2019s heartbeat. There is nothing untoward.<\/p>\n
\u201cDamnable dwarf,\u201d he mutters, even though, in the final analysis, there is very little in Mr. Gulley\u2019s situation that is actually Joffun\u2019s fault.<\/p>\n
A wolf howls, lonely, in the basements far below him.<\/p>\n
Somewhere in the halls upstairs from him his cat Inedible clanks ponderously back and forth.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Mr. Gulley sits by the phone in an empty house. Somewhere in the halls upstairs from him his cat Inedible clanks by. He used to have servants. He\u2019s fired them. He used to have a wolf. He still does have a wolf, really, but he doesn\u2019t go near it. It\u2019s too dangerous now. He just […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":5273,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[],"series":[47],"class_list":["post-5288","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-the-storm-that-saw-itself-chapter-4","series-the-storm-that-saw-itself"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/Hat_4_nobg.png","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5288","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5288"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5288\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6139,"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5288\/revisions\/6139"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/5273"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5288"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5288"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5288"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/books.hitherby.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fseries&post=5288"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}